“From Overpraise to Self-Worth: Strategies to Fix Validation Dependency”

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We live in a world where we get likes, shares and comments on social media daily or even hourly. Although one may always want appreciation from others, it becomes a problem to some extent since one only struggles to please others. This is a malaise often referred to as “Overpraise Syndrome” and has far-reaching effects on the self-esteem of a person, his/her psychological well-being and even physical health. In this blog, I’ll be discussing what Overpraise Syndrome is, what makes people overpraise what happens as a result of the same and the various ways one can avoid falling victim to the illness of validation. https://amzn.to/4fGkmsR

A CASE STUDY: Maya has always been a very achieving girl. Growing up she performed well in her studies, sports and other co-curricular activities. She was encouraged by others by receiving a lot of attention and comments, which made her dependent on them. Maya’s need for love only increased as she aged. Social media became her preferred platform for fast acceptance. Every post, picture, and achievement was carefully and consciously constructed for likes and favourable feedback, especially positive comments. It turned into her supply of instant approval on social media websites. https://amzn.to/3OnZLO0

Maya lived being guided by the number of hearts and thumbs up she had on the Internet. But, in reality, behind the beautifully curated life that she presented on social media, she was not okay. Her continual craving for approval made her feel insecure and nervous. She began to worry about how other people saw her and became fixated on every little detail. She felt as though she would never be able to fully unwind or be herself because of the unbearable strain. She found herself obsessed over every detail, concerned about how others saw her. The pressure was unbearable, and she felt as if she could never completely relax or be herself.

One day after a tough week, Maya took a break from social media. She realised her worth was not determined by the number of likes she received. It marked a turning moment in her life. She began to focus on her personal goals and ambitions, taking pride in her accomplishments without seeking outward validation. Maya started to learn mindful self-acceptance, trying to regain her damaged self-image from the inside. Maya started to practise mindfulness and self-compassion, gradually regaining her self-esteem from the inside. https://amzn.to/3V5Um1R

What is Overpraise Syndrome?

Overpraise Syndrome refers to a state of affairs whereby people rely much on the praise they receive from other people. What this makes people do is look forward to approval and recognition by other people, which makes them feel like they are insufficient without it.

Causes of Overpraise Syndrome

Social Media Influence: This is another important factor that will explain Overpraise Syndrome; due to the introduction of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and other social sites. It signifies that people are exposed to constant interaction in line with likes, comments, and shares that make many people dependent on external apparatus.

Childhood Conditioning: Most people get Overpraise Syndrome from how they were raised. The gross development for children comes about when parents and teachers reinforce the behaviour through excessive praise when children perform their tasks.

Cultural Expectations: Another factor that contributes to the formation of Overpraise Syndrome is cultural perception of the opposite sex: expectations of society. In cultures, that constantly emphasize accomplishments or reevaluation by other people, a person might experience a need for approval.

The Consequences of Overpraise Syndrome

Low Self-Esteem: Thus, designing one’s whole life based on the opinion of other people can result, for example, in low self-esteem. Whenever people do not get the kind of feedback they were looking forward to, they feel like they are not good enough.

Anxiety and Stress: The constant need for approval also creates anxiety and stress. People might have a concern about how they are seen by other people, and they get anxious when other people do not compliment them.

Reduced Motivation: Self-generated motivation is also reduced because Overpraise Syndrome threatens goals and decreases intrinsic motivation. In as much as people require extrinsic motivation to keep them going they may forget what they want to do.

“How to Fix Our Validation Habit” since one of the core problems with the way we interact with each other is the unhealthy and risky reliance on validation as a means of connecting with people, seeking approval, finding acceptance, and getting our self-worth back on track.

Practice Self-Compassion: Concentrate on self-care, and this means loving oneself as much as possible. Understand you don’t need man’s validation, you are worthy on your own. Example: Writing a gratitude journal – The first few steps for developing a gratitude journal are creating it and starting by writing down what you are grateful for your accomplishments, personal traits, and anything else that inspires you daily.

Set Personal Goals: Stop trying to gain other’s approval and instead strive to accomplish personal objectives. Example: Make a list of goals that you want to achieve in life and put it on paper in the form of a vision board.

Limit Social Media Use: Cut down the time spent on social networking sites in order to hamper one’s chances of being affected by social proof. Example: Particularly restrict the total number of hours to spend on SNSs or step by step interrupt the usage.

Self-love and Seek Internal Validation: Develop habits that are aligned with authentic self-love, for example practising mindfulness or meditation. Example: Daily meditate to become aware of some parts of yourself to be able to see and cultivate intrinsic worth.

Surround Yourself with Supportive People: Cultivate acquaintances you can look up, to who will support your choices without deceitfulness. Example: Spend time with people who appreciate you for who you are, rather than what you achieve.

FAQs
Q: Can you advise me how I can distinguish that have Overpraise Syndrome?
A: SYMPTOMS of Overpraise Syndrome would be anxiety whenever there is no outside approval, the need to be constantly reassured by others and low self-worth whenever one is not complimented.

Q: Overpraise Syndrome: What negative repercussions?
A: The long-term impacts include low self-esteem for an extended period, stress and anxiety and low intrinsic motivation.

Q: Overpraise Syndrome: How does mindfulness assist?
A: Mindfulness makes people become aware of themselves, accept themselves and discover their value not from the standpoint of society.

Q: Can reducing the usability of social networks contribute to the improvement of self-esteem?
A: Of course, avoiding social media as much as possible can free a person from external pressure and enable him to attain personal spiritual objectives.

Call to Action
If you use overpraise as a way of motivation, do know that you don’t have to earn your worth from men’s approval. Be kind to yourself, work on personal goals and, in general, make sure to find positivity within yourself. Please use the comment form below to share your experiences and tips with other readers as well as myself, and continue to be part of a growing community of people seeking self-acceptance and genuine acceptance from others.

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